There are various myths about bridal parties that have set the rules and expectations for many brides when choosing their bridesmaids. Here are some of the myths and whether or not they still apply today.
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Myth #1: Everyone in my party needs to be single.
False. This is an old tradition that no longer applies. Members of your bridal party can be single, in a relationship, engaged, or even married. If they are a close friend or family member, then don’t hesitate to ask. Since the bridal party members tend to be apart from their guest/fiancé/spouse through the wedding, consider making it easier for them by somehow integrating their date. It's ok if their date is not a groomsman as long as you are considerate and try to accommodate them. For example, you can invite their dates to the pre-wedding celebration at the bride’s house, or consider having a bridal party table for the reception and include their significant other.
Myth #2: I can’t have anyone in my bridal party who has a child.
False. Again, this is an old tradition that does not apply in the modern times. The main reason brides and grooms tend to not include those who are parents in the bridal party is because it is difficult for the bridal party member to be apart from their child for a long period of time. So consider ways you can allow your bridal party member to either still be close to their child, or be comfortable being apart. For example, if you are having the child at the wedding, then consider inviting your bridal party’s parents so they can watch the child during the wedding.
Myth #3: If I was in somebody’s bridal party, I must ask them to be in mine.
False. Everyone has a different definition of friendship and some people might consider you their BFF but the feeling is not mutual. Or you might have so many close friends and family members that you just have too many people that can be in a bridal party. So pick the people who are closest to you that you want to have around you during your entire wedding day. And if you think one of your friends/cousins/etc might get their feelings hurt if you don’t ask them, then have a talk with them in advance. In almost all cases, you’ll see that your friend/cousin/etc understands and appreciates that you took the time to talk to them about the situation.
Myth #4: Everyone in my bridal party has to wear the same dress.
False. Although most brides still choose the same dress for all the members of their bridal party, this is no longer a must! For example, you can choose a specific color for everyone to wear or choose different variations of a dress such as halter, strapless, one shoulder, etc. Similarly, the bridesmaids do not all have to have the same hair style, make up, shoes and accessories. If you choose to have different looks, it is important for the bride and the party to communicate and coordinate to ensure consistency.
Photo by Armen Asadorian Photography
In general, bridal party members should be the people who are closest to you that you want surrounding you the whole day. Once you pick your party, consider and involve them when making decisions. Remember pick your members and the details based on your relationships and your wedding dreams rather than rules and obligations.